Pfizer CEO Teams Up With Publisher’s Clearing House. Offers, “Free Boosters Every Week for Life!”

Publisher’s Clearing House has finally found the niche they were waiting for. Free coronavirus booster shots for life.

“It’s the perfect blend of practicality and enthusiasm,” said the Pfizer CEO. 

The Publisher’s Clearing House president remarked:

“This is a wonderful mix of game show excitement and free health care for life! How could anyone not want to win this grand prize?”

This year’s winner is B. Saget. When asked, Saget said:

“This is just great. You know, I’ve been puttin’ this thing off for too long now. I’ve been too busy screwing the Olsen twins. And I screwed them again when they turned fifteen. Now give me my shot!”

Update: B. Saget died one week later. Cause of death is unknown.

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